{favorite things}

first watch/listen { http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33o32C0ogVM }

today, i think i'm going to take julie andrews advice and think of my favorite things. you should too.

i think we get caught up too often in the things that aren't going 'right' for us. we unconsciously put up our blinders. our blinders are things that do exactly as their name says, they blind us from seeing things. i always think about the things they put on horses on the side of their eyes so they have no peripheral vision. we put on our version of those blinders daily, without even realizing it.

i'll be the first to admit, i'm guilt of putting my blinders on frequently. especially lately. i've simply been down in the dumps over multiple things. and to make matters worse i've been focusing on that-the things that haven't been going the 'right' way. i haven't taken the time to take my blinders off and see the good things around me, the blessings within my 'crap'.

i was sitting here working on my homework when this song came through my pandora playlist and it made me stop. thats exactly what i need to do. i need to think of my favorite things and then i wont feel so bad. i know its cheesy. but seriously. imagine if we thought of our favorite things whenever we got upset, frightened, angry, sad or any emotion besides happy. our outlook on the situations we are in would be completely different. it might be exactly what we need to do to take down our blinders.

this is my goal for the rest of the week. or my motto. to think of a few of my favorite things. to find the things in the midst of my mess that i love. i'm going to be deliberate about bringing light into my darkness. to take down my blinders and see the full picture. no more tunnel vision. i want to see the kingdom of heaven and all its beauty raining down around me.

i'm off to find a few of my favorite things, and so should you.

{a light in the city}

one of my manifest spiritual gifts is missionary, and for the last 6 days i have been learning what that means for my life.

when people normally think of missionaries they think of the people that are over in Africa in a 3rd world country. we never think of right here in our own homes/neighborhood/cities.

i'll admit it myself. that is what i think of when i hear of someone being a missionary, or i think of a staff of a christian fellowship. i never think of myself or even the people i live with, or go to church with as missionaries. spending a week in st. louis on an InterVarsity urban project called "City Lights" changed this way of thinking for me.

i learned that i can be a missionary everyday right here in my own home, in my own neighborhood, at my own school and in my own city. City Lights has motivated me to be the light of Jesus in my city. i want to reach out to my neighbors and step out of the safety bubble we have all formed around Drake University. there are people right on the other side of the street that need someone to listen to their story. just listen.

i don't want to live here in this city without really living in it anymore. i don't want to go to a community church without the church or myself really being involved and apart of the community. i saw and heard of so many people moving into the rough neighborhoods in st. louis to become part of the community that their church was located in. why is it that i'm not doing the same?

this past week pulled at my heart strings and made me really question why we are so afraid of reaching out to our neighbors? is it because their skin is a different color than ours? or is it because they live in a house that is considered 'crap' to us? it even made me think why my chapter of InterVarsity after learning about the crazy love of Jesus these past 6 weeks isn't out there in our own 'Drake' neighborhood sharing that love?

as isaiah 58 says 6-8 & 9-10:

loose the chains of injustice

and untie the cords of the yoke,

to set the oppressed free

and break every yoke?

⁷ Is it not to share your food with the hungry

and to provide the poor wanderer with shelter—

when you see the naked, to clothe them,

and not to turn away from your own flesh and blood?

⁸ Then your light will break forth like the dawn...

...If you do away with the yoke of oppression,

with the pointing finger and malicious talk,

¹⁰ and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry

and satisfy the needs of the oppressed,

then your light will rise in the darkness

this is what we are called to do! so then why are we not getting off our butts and doing it? what are we so afraid of? what is holding us back?

i don't know about you but i'm ready for this. i'm ready to break the chains of oppression, to feed the hungry and clothe the naked. i'm ready to share what i have because we as the people of the Lord, are called to do this. what we have isn't even ours, so why are we trying to hoard it? as a wise man once said 'we must lay down our lives for something, we are all going to die, so what are you going to lay yours down for... your car? education? or for the needy and the call of the Lord?'

City Lights opened my eyes to see what the heart of God looks like. it showed me what truly living out the gospel means. thats what i want for my life. i want to be a reflection of the heart of God. i don't want my bible to just be a book i carry, i want it to be the story of my life.

im ready to be the light in this city!

{fill me up}

this may be a bit weird. but i'm going to blog about my new cup.

[yes, to you it may not look like much, but i seriously love this cup right now.]

i seem to go through phases, where i get a new cup or water bottle and i love them. you could even go to the extent that i become obsessed with using it. for example my new blue Drake Pharmacy and Health Science cup, i've only had the cup for about a day and since the moment it was washed it hasn't left my side. pathetic i know. before it was my via water bottle. there is something about these water bottles/cups that makes me enjoy drinking water. i think i've downed a good 8 cups full of water in the last 24hours. but the desire to use these water containers fades. eventually i wont drink as much water, the new excitement of using my cup or bottle will fade.

the love for my new water cup is much like my love for Jesus. it seems that whenever i have a new encounter or experience i am thirsty for more. my heart desires more. things seem to realign and life seems good. i want to run and find more of Him and His love in my life.

i fall in love with Jesus all over again just like i love a new cup. i want to be in his presence just like i want to use my cup all the time. overtime though my desire for more becomes less. my thirst dries up. my need for my cup is still there. much like my via water bottle, i have to have it with me in class or at work, but i don't desire to drink from it constantly. this is exactly how my relationship with Jesus is. i love Him with everything for a period of time, wanting more and more of His presence. but soon that love loses its strength. i still need Him like i need my water bottle to be around. He is still apart of me, always there. however, i seem to only use Him when i really need something. its just like how i use my water bottle -i fill it up every morning so i will have water when i need it throughout the day. i depend on Jesus like i depend on my water bottle. simply put it isn't right. i 'use' Him and thats not what this relationship is about. my love for Him should be unlike any other love i contain. i should love Him with everything all the time.

did you know that when you are thirsty it means you are already dehydrated?

i'm thirsty for more of Him after i have an encounter with Him because i am dehydrated. i don't ask to be filled up every day. i go on empty way too often. i carry Jesus around with me like my water bottle and not much more. i want to be thirsty always. this doesn't align with my medical brain to want to be thirsty and dehydrated always, but in the spiritual sense it make all the sense in the world. we should be thirsty daily because no matter what we have or experience there is always more. we can never be fully satisfied or saturated, and thats okay. thats the whole point. we get to experience more, an abundant amount more. we get pieces of the fullness of heaven here and now. we will never be completely full until the day we come face to face with our loving creator in heaven.

its when we settle with what we have, with our lives, and our relationships, that we lose our thirst for more. i don't know about you, but i don't want that anymore. i want to continue to be thirsty. i want to desire more and search for it. i want to wake up every morning and before i even hit the ground running from one thing to the next i want to asked to be filled up and be thirsty all day long at the same time. and at the end of the day i want to be satisfied yet ready for more the next day. i want a clear mind and eyes to see the newness of Jesus everyday. i want to experience Him daily so that He will be like my new cup every morning!

i want to be filled. filled to the rim. and then more so that i can overflow!

{beautifully broken}

i want this blog to be about truth.

i want it to challenge me to see the 'good' things in my life. to stop focusing on what isn't going right, or worrying about the worst thing that could happen.

i want a reason to praise every moment of the day.

i want to search for love and find what it looks like for me.

i want to learn the truth of who i am and the purpose i hold.

i don't want to settle anymore with my life. i'm done saying 'this is just how my life is going to be'. i want something more... i want [LOVE].

i want to experience love and share it.

i want to see the beautiful things in my life, in the midst of all the broken chaos.

i want to be beautifully broken!